


"You're awful, i love you..." [The Joker/Harley Quinn/Steve Rogers - One shot].

by A_Wolf



Category: Captain America (Movies), Chris Evans - Fandom, DC Cinematic Universe, Echelon - Fandom, Margot Robbie - Fandom, Marvel Cinematic Universe, jared leto - Fandom
Genre: A.Wölf, Multi, Tumblr: theartofimagining13
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-26
Updated: 2016-07-26
Packaged: 2018-07-26 23:41:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7594879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Wolf/pseuds/A_Wolf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on: Imagine: You dated the Joker before he was sent to Arkham Asylum. Years go by and you marry Steve Rogers, but your ex looks for you as soon as he’s out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"You're awful, i love you..." [The Joker/Harley Quinn/Steve Rogers - One shot].

**Author's Note:**

> Song referenced in tittle: "Love me dead" by Ludo.  
> When i wrote “Shooting chandeliers” i forgot to mention that i consider that song to be perfect for Harley + The Joker. So here i am, saying it now because i love music and it inspires me. K, bye. ahaha.

**Originally posted at** : [The Art of Imagining](http://theartofimagining13.tumblr.com/).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

* * *

Tony Stark was working on his iron suit in the back of his workshop.

He was welding the right arm and connecting electrical wires when a noise, coming from his study, distracted him. He pushed his welding mask back.

_-Hello? …Pepper?_

He walked into the study and stopped in his tracks when he found two men in suits and wearing masks, guarding a third man who was sitting on his rotating chair which was facing the opposite way; Stark could only catch a glimpse of his green hair sticking out.

Tony’s holographic computer was projecting each of the Avenger’s ID’s. Clearly, the man with the green hair had been snooping around.

 _-Who are you?_ –Tony asked.

The chair spun around slowly and Tony’s eyes widened then narrowed when he recognized the man; Gotham’s famous villain, The Joker.

_-Shouldn’t you be…?_

_-In… Arkham… Locked away?_ –The Joker asked, interlacing his fingers over his cane.

Tony looked at the holograms of his team’s personal information and assumed the worst before speaking,

_-Listen, I don’t know why you’re here but I thought Nick Fury had a deal with you people. We don’t go to the city that must not be named, and you don’t come here._

_-You have something that belongs to me._ –The Joker said. – _And_ _I want it back._

_-That’s impossible._

_-Well, not you per se but…_ -The Joker grabbed his cane and used it to point at Steve Rogers’ ID.

_-What could Captain Rogers possibly have that belongs to you?_

_-My Harley._

Tony stared at The Joker in silence even though his lips parted several times as if trying to find the right words but failed each time.

_-So… let me get this straight. Steve… has your motorcycle?_

The Joker erupted in laughter and stood up to pace around, running his fingers along Stark’s desk and getting a black marker in the process. He started drawing a goatee on his face taking glances at Tony every now and then, clearly mocking him.

Tony rolled his eyes.

 _-Jealous? Can’t grow one?_ –He asked.

The Joker glared at him.

 _-Where is she?_ –He asked menacingly.

_-Why don’t you try his garage before I call Nick Fury and tell him you’re here?_

The Joker held his hands up as if surrendering before he ordered his guards to follow him outside. He didn’t want to start a war, he wanted information, and he had it.

* * *

Steve was making coffee when his wife walked in.

 _-It smells delicious._ –She said taking off her coat.

Steve raised his eyebrows with a smile and walked towards her to kiss her and hand her a cup of coffee.

 _-How was your day?_ –He asked.

_-Schizophrenia and paranoia are affecting a bigger percent of the population since the superheroes started mainstreaming._

Steve showed an apologetic look.

 _-Yeah, you’d think they’d feel safer but now they just keep expecting chaos 24/7._ –She added taking a sip of her hot beverage and adjusting her glasses. – _What about you?_

 _-Natasha called. We’re being sent to Africa for a week_.              

She frowned and pouted, but she was used to him being gone. She understood his job.

 _-I’ll be back before you know it._ –Steve said. _–We’re leaving tonight._

She looked at the scattered mail on the table and sat down to go through it. Steve opened the fridge and she asked,

_-Are we still going out to dinner?_

_-I’ll just take a shower first._

_-Is this from Bruce?_ –She asked holding up a green envelope and giggling.

Steve chuckled and sat next to her.

 _-It’s addressed to me actually._ –She muttered.

She opened the envelope and her heartbeat stuttered when she pulled out a Joker playing card. She let out a quiet gasp.

 _-What is it?_ –Steve asked. _–Harleen, what is it?_

 _-I have to go._ –She said standing up and grabbing her coat, never letting go of the envelope and the card.

Steve watched dumbfounded as she walked out of the house. He stood up, thinking about getting on his motorcycle to go after her, but she had already gotten in her car and driven off when he reached the porch.

* * *

Harleen drove across town and entered old rainy Gotham.

She walked into a golden room that brought so many undesired memories back, the strip club where she, along The Joker, used to hold business meetings at. Everyone in the club seemed to notice her but they all looked away out of respect once the surprise had faded.

She caught a glimpse of him behind a golden bead curtain and her heart accelerated out of mere fear.

 _-Ah! There she is._ –The Joker exclaimed as soon as he saw her. – _Late as always._

He was surrounded by guards as usual.

 _-Leave us!_ –He snarled at them. – _You can stay._ –He said pointing at the one with a purple tie.

Harleen hesitantly sat across from him.

 _-When did you get out?_ –She asked.

 _-Oh, come on now… don’t I get a “Hi, puddin’!” at least?_ –Said The Joker pursing his lips.

She stared at him in silence and showing no expression.

 _-Last night. Missed me?_ –He said without receiving an answer from her and studying her work clothes. - _But what have they done to you?_ _What are all these grays and blues? You used to be… so colorful. Well, after all, you did marry a flag, didn’t you._ –He said laughing.

She remained stoic.

The Joker’s laughter died down and he got serious again.

 _-You forgot to take it off by the way_. –He said glancing at her left hand and the ring on her finger. 

She placed her hand underneath the table.

_-I’m not here to stay._

The Joker tensed up and narrowed his eyes.

_-Have you forgotten who you are, Harley?_

A chill ran down her spine after hearing that name for the first time in years.

 _-I am a psychiatrist. Dr.Harleen Quinzel_. –She said gritting her teeth.

The Joker stood up and knocked the glasses off the table, making her jump. Then he leaned over it so their faces were close enough to whisper and be heard over the loud music.

 _-I broke you once, I can do it again. Look around you, Harley. Do they respect you like this in the… Avengers territory? –_ He chuckled before adding, _-I bet they don’t even know who you are._

_-I worked really hard to forget all of this, Jack. I’ve mo-_

_-I am not your patient! –_ He growled.

The Joker smoothed hair from his face and adjusted his coat before speaking again.

-So don’t call me that. –He said in a more collected manner.

- _I’ve moved_ _on. Stay the hell away from me and my husband or I will put you back in Arkham._

 _-There she is._ –He said with a wicked smile. _–You see? I knew you were still in there. I’m not so crazy after all._ –He frowned at his own words. _–Well…_   _considering.._.-He added with a shrug.

Harley stood up but he spoke in a rush.

_-You really forgot it all? The midnight drives, the Bat chasing us, the chaos… the dresses, the jewelry? You sure you don’t miss it, sugar? You are mine and I never even had to put a ring on your finger._

Harley’s eyes welled up with tears but she swallowed the lump in her throat and turned around to leave. Like a snake, trying to hypnotize her by spewing venom, he kept talking.

 _-This is who you are, and you will come back to me because you know you’re much more than a boring housewife, baby. Give it up for Harley Quinn, ladies and gentlemen. –_ He yelled and started clapping as she walked away.

Everyone in the room erupted in applause.

The Joker’s eyes were flaring and he snapped his fingers twice.

A woman dressed in an office suit, June Moone, walked in after The Joker’s signal. She looked at him waiting for an order.

 _-Plan B… Bring her back to me._ –He sung.

June nodded and went after Harley.

 _-Enchantress._ –She muttered under her breath.

As soon as she said the word, her blue eyes and blonde hair changed color; they were green and her hair was dark now, while an aura of dark magic surrounded her now half-naked body. She pressed her hand against her lips, with a vicious look on her face, and whispered a few words in Latin before blowing a kiss in Harleen’s direction. The dark magic floated across the room and hit her in the back of her head without her even flinching.

The last thing Harleen heard was the sound of The Joker’s maniacal laugh before walking out of there and feeling the rain on her skin.

* * *

Steve ran outside as soon as he saw Harleen coming back. She was soaking wet and in a daze.

 _-Don’t ever do that to me again._ –Steve said cupping her face in his hands _. –Are you okay?_

_-We need to talk._

_-I know… Tony called._

Harleen explained everything to Steve. He had never judged her for her past. When they met, she was already a successful psychiatrist and a good woman. That’s all he cared about. But with the Joker out of Arkham, Steve knew his wife was in danger.

 _-I know who The Joker is and what he’s capable of. You were a victim._ –Steve said.

_-I stole, I kidnapped, I killed._

_-Because he messed with your head!_ –Steve complained. – _Don’t blame yourself for this it was-_

_-I enjoyed every second of it, Steve._

Steve stared at her and took a deep breath.

_-I’m not going on this mission. I will personally put that clown right back where he belongs._

- _There’s a treaty. Fury will kill you. The Joker would have to strike first for you to take action_.

- _That play card’s enough for me. He broke into Stark’s house to get our address._

_-Was anyone harmed?_

_-No._

_-Then there’s nothing you can do._

Steve sighed loudly.

_-Well, I’m not exactly known for following Fury’s orders to the letter._

_-Steve, you have to go on that mission._

_-You’re in danger._

_-I… I will be fine._

* * *

Harleen’s eyes shot open in the middle of the night.

After a long discussion, she had finally convinced Steve to go to Africa and he had already left.

Harleen sat on the bed and she caught a glimpse of something that seemed to be glimmering in the darkness of the bathroom. She found herself lured to it, like the sleeping beauty to the spindle of the spinning wheel.

She found a gold lipstick tube in the open cabinet.

Soon, she started applying the red lipstick on while staring at herself in the mirror. She hadn’t worn that color in years since it reminded her of nothing but chaos. She looked at her blonde hair and decided to go blonder, so she went to the attic and fetched an old suitcase that hadn’t been opened in too long.

Harleen stared at herself in the mirror and she could see The Joker lurking in the dark behind her, and smiling at her as she kept transforming herself. She could hear whispers echoing in the bathroom.   _“You’re much more than a boring housewife, Harley”._ The Enchantress spell was fading and Harleen tried to fight the voices but they kept on whispering, _“Listen to us, listen to us again. Let us in”,_ until she succumbed and grabbed an eyeliner pencil to draw a little black heart on her cheek.

The mirage of the Joker behind her smiled and she imitated him for her transformation was complete. She showed that chaotic smile she hadn’t worn in years; she felt alive. The love she felt for The Joker never faded away. An irrational feeling bounded them together and it was almost like a tattoo on their skin. They were a perfectly dysfunctional couple and even though Harleen had built a life of her own, in her heart, it was always The Joker.

The thought of burning the perfect house she and Steve lived in occurred to her, but she was sane enough to know that he had been good to her and he didn’t deserve that. Instead, she took off her wedding ring and left it next to a note on the table.

Once Steve was back, he’d find her kiss on paper and he’d know she had gone back to her demented ex-lover by taking a glance at her signature.

_~Harley Quinn._


End file.
